Catch Some Wide Eye

Touch Down


for Jingle and all of her hard work

You run to be warm in the sun;
Fly high to be close to the sun.

Crimson colored buttons unfold,
their hands reaching up for the sun.

A worm wriggles up from his home,
skin blind to the pull of the sun.

Warm wind tickles feathers unfurled,
so hot like the bite of the sun.

Sparrow, as you make your way down
please sing for the light of the sun.

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45 thoughts on “Touch Down

  1. Pingback: Thursday Poets Rally Week 25 (July 22-July 28) | Jingle

  2. beautiful,
    you are a bird flying toward magic under the sun!
    🙂

  3. opoetoo on said:

    Wow
    I love the photo and that blind skin of worms.

  4. mairmusic on said:

    A delightful collection of images!
    http://mairmusic.wordpress.com/

  5. love the textures and descriptors you put in this…the worms day s seem numbered before the sparrow…

  6. this is beautiful.
    I really like it

  7. Truly amazing and pretty, loved the last two lines 😛 words that penetrated my mind and let me imagine all ^^

  8. Beautiful and spiritual! Thank you so much for commenting on my blog and adding me to your blogroll. The whole package makes me smile. 🙂

  9. nice:) i love the pic:)

  10. irradiatedpoetry on said:

    awesome!!

  11. i liked your use of repetition here and think that it really helped your poem read along in an easy rhythm! thank you for sharing 🙂

    • sparrowsong on said:

      Thanks! It’s an ancient form of Indian poetry I was reading about called Ghazal. I decided the only way to really get it was to try it out!

  12. This is a beautiful piece! I loved it!
    Pamela

  13. Thanks. I read this several times, and enjoyed it more with each reading. – Bill

  14. evangelinehannah on said:

    This is great! It makes me want to run outside right now and soak in some Vitamin D. 🙂

  15. sparrowsong on said:

    Go for it! And don’t forget the sunscreen.

  16. love your blog AND this poem!! i’ll be back, for sure.

  17. sparrowsong on said:

    Awesome! I look forward to seeing you around! 🙂

  18. great end line repetition with “Sun” kept thinking about Icarus, though .

  19. Nice poem, thanks for sharing.
    alan

  20. sparrowsong on said:

    Anytime, thanks for stopping by!

  21. akneis on said:

    Nice, thanks for sharing.

  22. a really great poem and photo, love them both. Lyrical words that flow so well together
    Like “Warm wind tickles feathers unfurled, so hot like the bite of the sun.” Creative and imaginative writing at its best.

    Joanny

    http://thedowsersdaughter.blogspot.com/

    Did two posts today one is for jingles rally .
    http://thedowsersdaughter.blogspot.com/2010/07/dance-of-fire-el-amor-brujo.html

  23. Crimson is such a great color to write about. Just the way it rolls off my tongue tickles me…crimson : ) “So hot like the bite of the sun” is a characteristic that I rarely see someone including to the sun’s résumé. Adding just a little more life than usual to the sun. I love how the sparrow is the only thing descending in your poem. It’s as if it is coming down from the heavens that the world is reaching for.

    • sparrowsong on said:

      I’m glad you caught that about the sparrow. Part of this poetic form I was researching requires that you put in a reference to your own nickname in the last stanza. So I decided to open and close with the sparrow to tell a story while keeping the stanzas independent, which is also a requirement of the form. 🙂

  24. Beautiful poem. I really loved the part about the worm.

  25. simple and elegant as a sparrow

  26. Fresh, bright, cheery, and an awesome tribute to Jingle’s zealous efforts!!!
    AND.. i love sparrows! 🙂

  27. sparrowsong on said:

    Jingle definitely deserves it!

    And that’s awesome, cuz sparrows love you, too! Hahaha. 🙂

  28. Pingback: Agreement 4 Rally Week 25 | Promising Poets' Parking Lot

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