Catch Some Wide Eye

Archive for the tag “emotions”

Heart


you
are the demon howl
of my soul

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Pressed


Detail of the Guanajuato mummies, Mexico. Blac...

i cannot by the pale worm rivers
my coffin bed creep
upon the midnight day
suffer the blankets of maggot strewn dust
to bury my love away

Bitter Exhaustion


13: Natural History

I’m the queen of good intentions when my kingdom turns to dust
ancient pallisades and bastiens sinking in the molten crust
dazed reflections of tomorrow in the shadows left before
knotted hands are left to borrow until there is no more
infection sinking deeper than all else ever will
the climb gets only steeper until I am eternally still

Flutter


lemonade stand days
to boy band phase
that girl flutters her lashes
and then she’s gone
through the prom up-dos
to her first I-dos
your girl flutters her lashes
until she’s gone
whether death do us part
or she takes out your heart
that girl flutters her lashes
and then she’s gone

but i was always here
in my rawest impression
i was cradled by fear
guarding my sweet confession
wrapped up in waves of the dearest depression
when you flutter your lashes
or i take out my heart
(as it crumbles apart)
i was courted by fear
(so if you ever draw near)
and i am already gone
you just remember this song

Anti-Valentine’s Day Poem


my seal has been punched open
i am forever broken
don’t buy this cap of lead
spread honey in my bed
toss my body in the woods
i am but broken goods

Honesty is The Best Policy


Today I uncovered a betrayal. A betrayal of trust, confidence, decency and professionalism. My own mentor, someone in whom I confided my doubts and fears, thoughts, ideas and struggles fell for the bait tossed out by petty, lawless musicians about town. The actual betrayal began a long time ago, slowly. I sensed it seeping into my bones until, in one instant, I looked around only to find myself completely alone in the cold, cruel world, shards of ice dripping from my nose. A bureaucracy  a vehicle constructed to make the world a better place, to educate and grow has done nothing but cripple and harden me to the only honest truth. There is no one on my side in the whole wide world, and my little cardboard walls will soon come a crumblin’ down.

A temporal poem based upon inconsequential feelings


The tape to your mouth
Seals me tight
Dragonfly life
Dragonfly height
You squeeze me tighter
Into a skincap
I cannot breath that
The words are melting
In the cognition pot
As it is there is only desire
Left still unmarred,
Thought I’m sure your heavenly antics
Will take a fair charge at her
Wanting to remand her to smoking blitherines
Cuts of purk, slices of diginity, and one wonders how she breathes
But held tightly close, unable to escape
While the shadows of night
Pour their powerful elixer into the hollows of my soul
I know that I want to scrape you into my veins
The very last part standing
To carry you in my vein-pockets like a sacred right
For an age to protect, to hollow you out
I want to bear you to new universes of thought
I want to bring your thoughts to fruition so please
Bury me, rhythm, swing the tease of an apron
On for you, no food for you, the nostrils will never be touched
By the sizzle of bacon
I want to swallow your demands until all we are
Is tiny hands in sweating pants
Resting meagerly upon their search for
The only liquid gold
That can not be bought or sold
A vein-pocket of you,
A serum maze of me
In a universe of togetherness,
Wait, and you.

Wrapped in Blankets


i cannot tame the tumultuous masses

that tremble within her gasping cough

nor can i tear the pale, yellowed skin

from confining the misery of her contorted face

as the chills bring her closer

to their distant reality

something not here

something not yet away

i feel the hot sting of tears

draping my mind as ever

she cannot go

she cannot die

she will not

My Boy


i wish i actually cared for you
as much as i pretend & say i do

Hearts are Never Roses


i am a mirror of the days you fell asleep
along your trembling lines my soul begins to creep

have you touched reveries worth more than painted dreams?
am i your victim now, or’s that just how it seems?

i am the emblem that you carry into war
for love or stern conquest, just tell me what i’m for

have you sought melodies that drip onto your tongue?
will you be loving me when fighting days are done?

i am a window to the days you thought were dead
hold out your hand, my dear, and let’s go back to bed.

Misery Chases Me in Circles With a Staple-gun


when i see you
my soul spasms
eking out a shrill cry
it has not uttered in centuries,
and it takes a thousand blankets
of the highest woven thoughts
to stifle the sound
for if you catch my soul
i will have nothing

A Love You Will Never Understand


i am that much closer to infinity
when i wrap my arms around you

to close my eyes is to collapse
into a shimmering massless thing
and inhale your serenity
until there is nothing left to breathe

to open my eyes is to engulf
your visage in passionate flames
and dance in the light of your song
until there is no more song to be sung

i am that much closer to serenity
when i wrap my mind around you:
a stranger both nameless and invisible
as imaginary as you are real

Prettier than Pink


he follows her footsteps
head bowed, silent.
she stares straight ahead,
does not slack
click, click, click

heels give her height
and height gives her power.

he glides into her rhythm
tips up his chin,
“will you at least look at me?”
he cries in a plaintive voice,
almost sweet.

“No,” she replies
cool, determined.

He stops abruptly,
mouth agape,
system too shocked,
too riddled with brutal rejection
to respond any longer.

She doesn’t even wince
as she continues the trail,
mutters under her breath,
“I walk alone.”

Math is Easy


Brought to Your Conclusions


you exhale your words
and their smoke fills up my eyes
while their substance beats my eardrums
senseless- words

words you exhale
exhale their smoke
you fill up my eyes
beat me senseless
my substance
frail, like a poem

you exhale me

[Written for the Poetry Potluck]

Saudade


Nostalgia

I bet you can hear it as well as I,
the sound of my phone not ringing.

I’d tell you about it,
about the visceral aches
the twitch reflexes that activate
when I try to answer a call I don’t have.

Lately, my email has stopped blinking, too
the wells of information are completely bared dry
and the mail carrier long stopped bothering to try
to deliver ghosts of letters that never were written.

Everywhere I go, there are stories in the walls
that I can’t read aloud
and photos in the sky
that I’ll never frame.

Lately, I have tried to stop dreaming,
because dreaming brings you back
and I fall for the lie.

I know you hear the sound of my phone not ringing,
and the kink in my throat as it has quit singing,
and the photos in the sky that will never quit bringing
the hauntings on my back that life keeps slinging

but yet there is hope and still I am clinging
Saudade, saudade, saudade.

Worthless


my feelings reach out to you in wide strokes
like tentacles searching for a dream
wildly swirling in faded tones,
but what is a feeling in the face of fact
in your left-right punches
towards my lonely dignity?

i am a hollow world wrapped in tinsel
while you reach out to me in wide strokes
like needle and thread searching for a seam.
my wooden tears flow softly
carving out words that you forgot
scrape, scrape upon my flesh and bones
what is written upon my weary heart

the meaning and purpose have been lost in the living
i am all that remains
you are all that is hidden

~Doraline Evans

In Memoriam


wind chimes tinkle in the breeze
which is more stiff than free
on this day when people hold their breath
afraid to breach the sacred
standing silent guard over memory
a memory too painful
to ever be forgotten

1943


Photo of Blue Wild Petunia (Ruellia carolinien...

Image via Wikipedia

in my picture frame pressed with flowers
i, a very long time ago,
sent some thoughts to a memory jaded
and was met with swift, cruel winds
and my picture frame pressed with flowers
bent to drink in the cool dew
stooped to take the blow to heart
as often the natural things do
in my picture frame pressed with flowers
once, a summer’s night turned to gold
and the children’s ears burned at the sound
the laughter, the rose bud glimmer in the snow
as i sit by the window and looked outwards
upon a very long time ago.

[Inspired by the video below.]

Apologies for the Dust


youth with her many splendored robes
has stolen away in the night
leaving in her wake a cloud of regrets
as i clutch my blankets tighter around my throat
fevered, chilled, haunted am i
as the bubbles of innocence fade
leaving behind them the film
proof that they existed once
brightly colored, frail
and the joy that once radiated from my soul
is a hollow ember
trapping the world around me in bitter embrace
as i, wounded, cannot contend
guilt strips my heart for being so somber
the world turns to grey at my breath
and i am sad, i am sad, i am sad.

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